Forever and Always
by theultimatenerd04
Summary: She never thought it would come to this. She never thought she would have to say goodbye so soon. She just wants him to stay. She knows it's selfish, that prolonging the inevitable will only cause them both pain but she can be selfish this once, can't she? She's allowed to be selfish when it comes to her loved ones. A songfic based on Forever and Always by Parachute.


**Disclaimer: All the lyrics written in cursive belong to Parachute. The song's called Forever and Always. I 100% recommend a listen; It's amazing. **

_/She's sitting at the table_

_The hour's getting later/_

Her eyes wander towards the window, lingering on the street for a second before she tears them away. Checking the clock, she sighs. It's only been a few minutes since she last looked.

_/He was supposed to be here_

_She's sure he would've called/_

The steadily darkening sky mocks her. She can feel its ever present gaze following her as she paces around the modest house. The sensation is only a reminder of her slowly climbing worry.

_/She waits a little longer_

_There's no one in the driveway/_

The knot of anxiety tightens in her stomach. It's not like him to her hanging like this.

_/No ones' said they've seen him_

_Why, is something wrong?/_

She's knocked on the neighbours' doors; asked if maybe he had come over earlier when she was at work. They hadn't seen him. She's called his coworkers but apparently he had disappeared after his lunch break. Her feeling of dread intensifies.

_/She looks back to the window_

_Suddenly the phone rings/_

Her body freezes, her fingers stopping their systematic tapping to hover over the table. Slowly, she gets up and walks mechanically over to the phone stand as if on autopilot.

_/A voice says, something's happened_

_That she should come right now/_

The voice is soft. She knows that they are trying to soften the blow but she hangs up without saying anything anyway. Her hand is steady as she places the phone down gently. She stares at it, face impassive.

Somewhere inside of her recoils at her lack of reaction. Surely she loved him enough to cry at the news? But another part of her knows that it's because she's not surprised. Somehow, she already knew.

It was in the pricking sensation that just screamed that something was wrong had been following her ever since he didn't arrive. In the nagging feeling deep in her bones as she tries to distract herself with menial work. In the persistent head-ache right behind her temples whispering the same damning words over and over again.

_/Her mind goes to December_

_She thinks of when he asked her/_

_/He bent down on his knee first_

_And he said/_

When he got onto his knees, her heart started pounding. He spoke those three words to her with that adoring look in his eyes and she knew instantly what she was going to say. A part of her brain acknowledged that she had known for a while.

_/I want you forever_

_Forever and always_

_Through the good and the bad and the ugly_

_We'll grow old together_

_Forever and always/_

She still remembers the frown that creased his brow when she started to cry. He asked her if she was ok, if she thought he was moving too fast. That moment just reaffirmed her answer.

_/She pulls up to the entrance_

_She walks right to the front desk/_

She doesn't say anything. Can't saying anything. But she looks at the receptionist with pain-filled eyes, desperate to know if he's still alive. The man behind the desk takes one look at her and his eyes soften. He's seen enough of grieving family members to understand. His lips move, asking her who she's here to see. She sees them move but she can't hear him. She can't hear him, doesn't know if he can hear her but she chokes out his name anyway.

_/They lead her though a million halls_

_A maze that's never ending/_

Every hallway they take her down looks the same. She wants to retreat into herself. To hide and hope that the pain fades away. But she tells herself that she can't. She needs to be strong for him.

_/They talk about what happened_

_But she can barely hear them/_

She thinks she's in shock but she can bring herself to care. It's nothing compared to what he's going through.

_/She tries to keep a straight face_

_As she walks into the room/_

She almost stops moving when she sees him but forces herself to keep going. Be strong. Be strong. It's her new mantra. She clings to the familiarity of the words and holds them close.

_/She sits by his bedside_

_Holds his hand too tight/_

She knows her grip is too strong. She knows she should let go. But she looks at his face and realises how much she needs him in her life. She can't let him go. She squeezes tighter and he flashes a wan smile at her.

_/They talk about the kids they're gonna have_

_And the good life/_

She tries to keep him upbeat and hopeful but they can both feel the time slipping by. She tries to stop it but no one can control time. Only the gods have the power to do that.

_/The house on the hillside_

_Where they would_

_Stay, stay there forever_

All they've ever wanted was to retire somewhere and raise a family. He'd been hesitant at first and she never blamed him. They'd both read the articles explaining how abuse was passed down families. Eventually, she'd promise to immediately divorse him if he did anything untoward. He'd immediately agreed and it had been a dream ever since.

They lapse into a comfortable silence and she jumps a little when his raspy voice breaks the stillness.

_/Forever and always/_

It's a promise.

_/Through the good and the bad and the ugly_

_We'll grow old together_

_And always remember_

_Whether rich or for poor or for better_

_We'll still love each other_

_Forever and always/_

A smile pushes its way onto her lips at the reminder. She responds in kind, saying those three words that are so often taken for granted. It's only when the person who means the most to you is about to be taken away that you wish you had said it more.

_/Then she gets an idea_

_And calls in the nurses/_

He calls to her. Asks what she is doing. She grins feverishly at him, a maniacal light in her eyes. If he is going to be taken away from her, she wants his last memory happy not in a white hospital bed in a white hospital room in a white hospital.

_/Brings up the chaplain_

_And he says a couple verses/_

She sees comprehension dawn on his face and feels a brief feeling of uncertainty. What if he didn't want to? What if he just wanted to spend his last hours on earth alone? The uncertainty is washed away as he reaches for her, that look of adoration back in his eyes. She never wants it to leave. If she could just preserve this moment, she would.

_/She borrows some rings_

_From the couple next door/_

He takes one and so does she.

_/Everybody's laughing_

_As the tears fall on the floor/_

It's an oxymoron but it's her life in this moment. She's so happy to finally be marrying the man she loves but at the same time, tears pour down her cheeks. She hates that this is what finally pushed them to take the step.

_/She looks into his eyes and she says/_

_I want you forever_

_Forever and always_

_Through the good and the bad and the ugly_

_We'll grow old together_

_And always remember_

_Whether happy or sad or whatever_

_We'll still love each other_

_Forever and always/_

She's had no time to prepare them like she normally would with something this important but she can't bring herself to care. They are both here, both in love and that's all that matters to her.

_/Forever and always/_

It's a promise.

_/Forever and always/_

He repeats it after her and it's like a prayer.

_/She finishes the vows but_

_The beeps are getting too slow/_

She covers his hand in hers, willing her strength into him. She knows how much this means to him. He never thought he would love someone like this before he met her. His voice is quiet and raspy but he persists, opening his mouth to say:

_/I'll love you forever_

_Forever and always_

_Please just remember_

_Even if I'm not there_

_I'll always love you_

_Forever and always/_


End file.
